When I was pregnant, I never had a baby shower. Am I bitter? A little. But that's what happens when you just moved a thousand miles away from your friends and family. Also, I don't have a sister. Maybe if I had a sister, I would have gotten a baby shower.
As I said, there were times when I felt bad about it. When I was seven months pregnant, a baby shower was thrown during our Team Meeting for an OT who was six months pregnant. It made me feel a tad awkward, but I told myself that she had worked there for several years and knew everyone much better than I did, so it made sense.
This, however, was unacceptable to me:
I got pregnant during my PGY2 year. And like I said, no baby shower. Then during my PGY3 year, another girl in my class, let's call her Miranda, got pregnant.
When she was about 5-6 months pregnant, Miranda was working with a female attending named Dr. Green. Coincidentally, I also was working with Dr. Green at that same time during my pregnancy. Anyway, Dr. Green took a PGY2 named Rita aside and told her that she wanted to plan a baby shower for Miranda for all the attendings and residents to go to. Rita then told me about this and asked if I wanted to be involved with the planning.
I. Was. Livid.
First, I was angry because Dr. Green thought to plan a shower for Miranda and not me. Second, Miranda had tons of family in the area and I'm positive she already had a shower being thrown for her. Third, Miranda was not well-liked by the other residents because she had a reputation for calling in sick a lot on Fridays.
I told Rita that I refused to attend the baby shower. I wasn't going to take Miranda out to dinner and I wasn't going to buy her a present, because nobody did any of those things for me when I was in the exact same situation a year earlier. Rita asked me to reconsider and I again refused. I personally had nothing against Miranda, but it was a matter of principle. I would have felt humiliated attending that baby shower.
Anyway, the next time Dr. Green called Rita over to plan the shower and asked her what she thought they should do, Rita replied, "I don't know. What did you do for Fizzy's shower?"
And that ended the plans for Miranda's baby shower.