Saturday, June 2, 2012

It is what it is

Husband: "I don't know. It is what it is."

Me: "I hate that expression. What does that even mean??"

Husband: "It means it is what it is."

Me: "Ugh!"

I don't know when I started hating that expression so much. I think it's when they started saying it all the time on reality shows. What does it mean??

17 comments:

  1. Means there's no sense complaining about something that can't be changed

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  2. It's code for "I don't give a crap and want end this discussion." at least in the context of most discussions I've heard it used.

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  3. Oh and it's often accompanied by a shoulder shrug.

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    1. Ugh so true.
      By the way, it applies also to "que sera sera", which may possibly be worse, because you're still saying the same thing AND showing off.
      And I agree, it's a conversation ender. If I cared to listen, I would say "you are worrying about something you can't change, but let's discuss strategies to handle it better."
      Just saying "it is what it is" means "chill out and leave me alone."

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  4. Care to throw "Just sayin'" (pronounced without the G) in with "it is what it is"? Both equally annoying.

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  5. I told my husband that I was going to shove the capital "I" up his butt sideways if he said that one more time. I get you.

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  6. I think it just means to take something at face value, and not to try to find some deeper meaning.

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  7. I HATE this expression too. I had a whole post on it as well. I just say, "it certainly isnt what its not."

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  8. You and I would not get along -- I use that expression all the time!

    ER MD

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  9. Future Pharmer of AmericaJune 2, 2012 at 7:40 PM

    A tautology is a tautology.

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  10. I get really irritated when people say this. REALLY irritated. Thanks for posting this. People just need to stop.

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  11. When I say, "It is what it is", usually it's in response to someone complaining that reality doesn't accord with their preconceptions. It's short for something like this: "Objective reality exists independently of how you feel about it. If you don't like it, change it. Complaining will not change anything." (Other times, I say, "Yes, I understand how you feel.")

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  12. I hate this saying also. It tops the list of irritating phrases and catch-words, such as: touch base, epic, revolutionary, I know, right?, and Dr. Grumpy's favorite, Artisanal. Actually, I take it back. The use of the word "epic" has gotten so bad that I want to scream whenever my children turn on the Disney XD channel.

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  13. I take it to mean "I am resigned to my fate." They aren't happy about the situation but they aren't planning on doing anything about it.

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  14. I moved to Pennsylvania two years ago and I had never heard it before. I now catch myself saying it and die a little inside each time.

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  15. I have it tattooed on my inside wrist. Facing me, not other people, because it's my own reminder to me. Situations are what they are- they are neither MORE, nor LESS than what they are. All my life I struggled with awful situations created by people around me (including myself) because they could not accept situations for what they were. They lived lives full of denial, hiding, secrets, shame. Not grieving when they needed to grieve, or running when they needed to run, or banning people they needed to ban from their lives- acting like situations were less than they were. Not letting go of fear- acting like situations were more than they were. It also reminds me to let go of situations I just can't do anything about. For example, as a CNA in the home setting, I see a lot of my elderly clients that suffer little (or big) cruelties because of family caregivers in denial. Or the "caregiver" is OCD-controlling, or in some degree of dementia themselves, and other family members are in denial- the list is infinite. I have to let it go sometimes- often there is just nothing I can do about it. It is what it is.

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