Saturday, June 25, 2011

Weekly Whine: Ladies Rooms

It seems like every time I use a ladies room, I get completely furious. Really, there's very little about ladies rooms that doesn't make me angry.

The thing that makes me angriest is the inequity of actual toilets for women versus men. Recently, my husband and I were at a mall, and I noted that there were four toilets in the ladies room (a horrible injustice, which actually makes me not want to go to that mall). I asked him what the men's room looks like and he said that while there were two stalls for men, there were also three urinals. So there were MORE places for men to pee than women.

What is wrong with that?

1) It should at least be equal.

2) Really, there should be twice as many toilets for women as for men. Women have smaller bladders, even more so pregnant women.

3) Women are usually the ones who take children to the bathroom. So basically ladies rooms are for women AND children. Whereas mens rooms are just for men. (Like that hair dye.)

It always makes me furious when I have to wait on a long line to use the bathroom, while my husband gets in and out in two minutes. It's not like it's so great for the men either, since they're stuck waiting for us. The only people who benefit from this is gay men who don't socialize with women.

And of course, the other issues: the fact that the stalls often don't have a place to hang up a coat, which sucks when you're obligated to sit down. This was especially annoying at the hospital when I was wearing a long white coat. Hospital bathroom stall hangers are notoriously broken. And trying to pee with my coat on generally meant the contents of my pockets would get emptied onto the floor and/or the toilet.

And finally, pee on the seat. I have never been to a person's apartment and used their bathroom and seen pee on the seat. Not once. So how come every goddamn public bathroom stall has pee on the seat?


  1. Answer: The women who believe we all have deadly germs on our bare skin like to HOVER. They create the problem - if no one hovered, the seats would be clean for us all.

    (Of course, since there's pee on the seat after that, EVERYONE has to hover, and it gets worse..) (Pretty sure this is how nuclear wars get started.)

  2. What really infuriates me is pee on the seat in the handicapped stall. Some of the people using that one DO NOT HAVE THE OPTION of hovering.

  3. If you want to hover, fine. But at least wipe the seat off when you're done.

  4. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this about hospital bathrooms! I seek out the ones that I know have hangers for my coat!!

  5. What gets me pissed about hospital bathrooms is handicapped stalls with wall-mounted toilets.

    Wall-mounted toilets are designed to hold up to 250 lbs, and are designed with some idea that people will daintily sit down on 'em.

    A 180 lb person who swings themselves from a wheelchair onto the toilet can, quite literally, snap it right off the wall as their weight comes down on the seat.

  6. Even if you're "hovering" you're still firing at point-blank range. How on earth they get pee on the seat is beyond me. I can "hover" and not pee on the seat.

    Any yeah...if you do pee on the seat, wipe it off!

  7. As the aforementioned gay guy, I have to say public bathrooms are no treat for us either. A guys bathroom is only slightly above an open septic tank in terms of cleanliness. Multiply any woman's seat splash pattern x10 and you have a basic men's seat (I blame straight men in general). And there is an innate weirdness in peeing next to another guy, usually some shaggy mouth-breather. Maybe 1/5 guys will wash their hands afterwards too. So in summary, the grass may be greener on the other side, but it is watered with pee.

  8. The pee on the seat is like my #1 pet peeve. GAH!!!

  9. My personal pet peeve is shoe marks on the seats. We have a number of cultures here who squat rather than sit, so when they use a public toilet, they put at least one foot directly on the toilet seat. This often leaves shoe marks behind. And random sprays of pee. Yuck.

  10. We had a recent conversation in my department about the lounge bathroom. I was shocked to find out how many of my normally-thought-to-be non germo-phobe coworkers actually hovered. The rest of us were like, uh, we sit, duh! Can't catch cooties from the toilet seat. Health class 101.
    now, a Walmart bathroom...that is scary.

  11. Ill trade you some of our men's bathrooms at the mall if we can get some of your bathrooms at the ballpark. The answer why we can't, of course, is because some dipshit would sue

  12. why do you need to hover? I tend to line the seat with toilet paper in order to avoid sitting on pee. Cant the germophobes do that?