Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Annoying med student stories

When I was a resident, I had a med student named Gloria who had this thing she did where she tried to guess where people were from. I saw her do it no less than three times per day. She did it to everyone and they LOVED it, especially when she was right.

Especially men.

Medicine Attending: "Hi, I'm Dr. K."

Gloria: "Is that Israeli?"

Attending: "Why, yes it is!"

Me: "So, um, my patient's lungs are drowning... how much--"

Gloria: "You know, I went to Israel last year."

Attending: "Really? Will you marry me?"

I remember one day an intern came by from surgery. He was totally adorable and nice in a way that only an intern in his first week of residency could possibly be. And he had this thick Southern drawl.

Gloria: "Are you from Georgia?"

Intern: [drawls] "No, I'm from North Carolina."

Gloria: [disappointed] "Oh."

Intern: [drawls] "Georgia is the deep South. If I went to Georgia, they wouldn't even think I had a Southern accent. They'd be like, 'Are you from Connecticut?'"

For some reason, I thought that was hilarious.

Then when we were talking to some therapists, Gloria randomly says to one of them, "Are you an Aries?"

Therapist: [surprised] "Yes, I am!"

Gloria said that this therapist reminded her of all the Aries she knew. She told me she wouldn't date Pisces anymore because her ex-husband was a Pisces. Then I had to pretend like I didn't think that astrology is the dumbest thing in the universe. I'm a Leo though and we're skeptics. (Actually, I just made that up.)


  1. She sounds a little nuts, but kind of fun. Unless you're trying to get work done. Not sure what to say about the astrology thing except -- OF COURSE YOU CAN still dump on astrology after she's said something like that. You just have to turn it into a joke. About her.

  2. Oh my. I'm always amused when people try to figure out where I'm from by my speech. I have a very 'neutral' accent that still manages to completely misrepresent the nuetral accented region I'm originally from.

  3. Ha! I'm from Georgia and have NO accent at all. Everyone is always surprised. Of course, when people ask me where I'm from, they are asking about my ethnicity (i.e. you are not white...what are you?) and are always super-annoyed when I say Georgia. Then they ask where I was born. Brooklyn. Yes, i know what they mean. I'm just not going to acknowledge it!

  4. If I came across someone like that I would lie. Just cuz it's more fun to mess with them that way :P

  5. Haha, today a patient told me he was from the South and said cryptically, "You'll never guess where." Louisiana. I said confidently without any real justification. Yeah! New Orleans!

    Maybe I should start trying a few times a day and see if I can get good at it. I draw the line at the astrology part, tho'.

  6. heh. I used to play the accent game at the helpdesk (Techie ) I worked at. Kept people from bitching while I fixed their problems. I'd ask them where they were from and when they asked back i'd make 'em guess. If I was nice i'd give 'em the right continent. I lived in six country and my accent is mixed and nothing like my original tongue.

  7. OMDG: She might have been fun in some situation, but that was a really busy rotation and she was basically a nonstop hindrance.

    Nobody seems to be able to guess we're I'm from by my accent...

  8. You remember those people from when we were kids that told us not to worry about the little social stuff, having the popular clothes and the right friends and just generally being well-liked? Because, they said, you would get out of school and that stuff wouldn't matter, it's be all about who you were and what you could do?

    Those people lied to us. I wish I could find them and tell them off. As Gary Larson's Einstein says to his son: "You wanna go through this hell? No you don't. Here, learn to dribble this thing."

    Gloria will go far. We'll all be working for her someday soon.