Friday, April 27, 2012

Legal advice

Many years ago, I was having some issues getting out of an apartment lease. I decided to contact a lawyer in the area for advice on the matter. I picked a random lawyer out of the phone book and called him.

Me: "Hi, I was wondering if I could consult with Mr. Lawyer about an issue that may require hiring a lawyer."

Secretary: "Sure, what's your name?"

Me: "Fizzy McFizz."

Secretary: "Just hold on a minute."

A minute later, I was put through to Mr. Lawyer:

Mr. Lawyer: "Hey there. How are you?"

Me: "Fine, thank you. I just needed some legal advice on my lease. I was wondering if--"

Mr. Lawyer: "Wait, this is Fizzy McFizz?"

Me: "Um, yeah."

Mr. Lawyer: "I went out on a date with a Fizzy McFizz last weekend. That's you, right?"

Me: "Um, no..."

Mr. Lawyer: "Are you messing with me?"

Me: "No, I'm really not."

Mr. Lawyer: "Oh."

Me: "So I was just wondering, if I break my lease--"

Mr. Lawyer: "Are you sure you're not the Fizzy McFizz I went out with?"

Me: "I'm definitely not. But I just wanted to know if--"

Mr. Lawyer: "Listen, I don't give legal advice over the phone. The only reason I agreed to talk to you was because I thought you were this girl I went out with last weekend."

Me: "Oh."

Mr. Lawyer: "Sorry."

Me: "That's okay."

Of course, after I hung up, I was remorseful that I didn't tell the guy I was his date to get my free legal advice.


  1. Haha! That's funny. I cannot believe he did that, though. That was very unprofessional to tell someone that the only reason you took the call was because you thought she was the girl you went out with last weekend. But still, very funny. I do not think it would have made any difference though even if you told him you were the girl. I think he would have just kept going on and on about the "date" anyway..Haha!

  2. That was very funny conversation. Educational and entertaining.

  3. What are the chances that you would pick a lawyer at random, and have it be someone who had recently dated a person with your same name?

    1. I actually constantly meet people with my same exact name. So it's random, it wasn't that shockingly random.

  4. Nice. I know it isn't really the point of the story, but did you end up being able to get out of the lease?

    1. No. We just left and forfeited our deposit.

  5. what's wrong with being a gunner??