Dr. Calm: Did you notice that when I asked [our patient] to lie on her right side she farted?
Me: Yeah...I did notice that, actually.
Dr. Calm: And she didn't even excuse herself! She just kept right on talking! I guess she was hoping we wouldn't notice.
Speaking of which, I find it necessary to confess that one time when I was on my SICU rotation (November of my MS3 year) I farted in a coma patient's room and blamed it on him. I thought I was alone and the dude was all vented and sedated and everything so I didn't think he'd mind and then my resident walked into the room 2 seconds later and asked what the smell was. I said it was probably the patient. I wonder if he believed me. I really hope he did. I mean, I'm not totally sure if coma patients can fart, I'm guessing they can since they can have bowel movements and generally the two go together but I actually have no idea, now that I think about it.