Being the social butterfly that I am, I go to a lot of parties. Most of which involve buying a present for a small child.
And after, I can always guarantee that I'll get a thank you card, written by "the child" which says:
"Thank you so much for [insert toy name]! I really like playing with it."
It's a nice thought, but I think we can skip the cards. It's a waste of paper and energy. I mean, do I really care if I get a stupid form-letter thank you card? And the whole thing means that I have to keep stacks of blank thank you cards in my bookcase, for fear of offending someone.
And don't get me started on those fancy bags every present has to come with these days.
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My mother was into etiquette. She (and Emily Post, the guru of etiquitte) taught me ig you thank the giver in person, it is not necessary to send a thank you note. There are some exceptions, and its never "wrong" to send a note, but I agree way overdone.
ReplyDeleteI think it's important to teach kids to write thank you notes, and it's definitely a dying art. Whether or not you think it's necessary for children's birthday gifts, there are business situations (interviews...) where it's required, so why not practice it when they are young?
ReplyDeleteYeah, but I've received dozens of thank you notes from kids under 3, who are clearly not writing them or even part of the process or aware that they're being written at all.
DeleteWhen my son was little, he went to a birthday party where the mother had attached thank you notes to the goodie bags. I thought that was the tackiest thing I'd ever seen. Thank you notes are supposed to be personal. I agree with anonymous, that kids need to learn to write them and show gratitude towards someone who takes the time to pick out a gift for them.
ReplyDeleteWe do it because my sister threw a huge hissy fit about people not sending thank you cards and I need to harass her at every chance because I love her just that much.
ReplyDeleteIf it bothers you that much I think there is a way to send e-cards by paying a small fee. Paperless!
I love a nice handwritten note, but when I've given someone a present, I'd much prefer they look me in the eyes and give a heartfelt thank you. I don't need a note for that.
ReplyDeleteNow that my son can write, I have him send thank you cards. I'm not doing it for the person receiving the thank you card, I'm doing it to teach my son manners. And my son has received thank you cards from birthday parties he attended, and it always makes him happy. Granted, getting a 7 year old to write 20 thank you cards is an absolute pain, but call me old fashioned, we are still doing it.
ReplyDeleteOops, this comment is ancient history, but I'm with you 100%. It's about teaching our kids to take a few minutes to think about the friends and family who shared in celebrating their big day, and acknowledge that the givers spent their hard-earned money on a gift and came to the party because they thought it would make our kids happy. It's too bad that we take these things for granted as we move towards a lowest-effort possible society. We always love opening the thank you cards we receive. My son loves seeing his name on an envelope and being reminded that his friend liked what he brought... This was especially true when was son was too young to understand why we were buying a toy and (GASP) we were giving it away! It reminds him that being generous brings joy to others, and we share in that joy because we love our friends. Not to mention, it's good to practice handwriting and to talk about the postal service and how addresses work, and it's fun for us to walk to the mailbox and put the letters down the chute and imagine what's going to happen to them nexr,
DeleteMy kids have sent out thank you cards since they could somewhat write their names. I think etiquette and manners have gone down hill in this day and age. They also are taught to say please, thank you, no Sir, yes Ma'am - I'm not Emily Post, but my children WILL learn manners.
ReplyDeleteEtiquette changes over time, and I think the thank you card is going the way of the dinosaur. People cling to it, but they've become mostly pointless. I think my generation (Millenials) will probably mostly do away with it, and the generation after us will completely do away with them. It should be perfectly acceptable to just say thank you to someone, and I really think it is, at this point.
ReplyDeleteI have a friend in New Orleans that writes them for everything. He sends them out after every party he attends or any gift he receives, no matter how small. It's nice, but time-consuming and outdated. I would be happy with people just telling me thank you outright.
ReplyDeleteI agree that thank you cards are pointless. I especially can't stand the part of the party when someone is frantically writing down who gave what. I find it majorly awkward. The kids giving the gifts are standing right there. You can thank them then.
ReplyDelete